Usually, on my way back home at nights in the office cab, my mind is pre-occupied with many many things. I put on the earplugs and music as soon as the cab starts. That time of about 45 minutes is my time always. I avoid making calls that time. And occasionally check Facebook. But more or less, that time is mine. And more often than not, as soon as the music is tuned in, memories of people, some nice times and some things good, bad and ugly flood my head. Those 45 minutes are not just me and music. There are memories too. Sometimes, I am thinking about the missed chances and sometimes, close escapes.
However, tonight it was different. Pleasant weather with cool breeze, an overcast sky with a sporadic appearance by moon from behind the thick blanket of gray clouds, air-conditioning off in the cab, windows rolled down, music plugged in. And then, I felt one with nothing and no one but myself. I felt alone but not lonely. In those moments, I was actually living in them. Suddenly there was nothing to drain my brain. No good, bad and ugly. Nothing. The thoughts were positive. I was thankful. There was hope. Hope for the new leaves that shall be turning in soon. Hope for something better.
Infact, music too seemed fading away in the background. It was as if I was flowing and blending seamlessly in the fast changing landscape around me, from one flyover to another, from one lane to another crossing.
I have never felt so over-whelmed with feelings that I am still to name, like I did tonight. I knew I had to treasure this night. For those nights when I may not feel this hopeful or life may not be upto the mark. I knew I had to stash this night away for eternity, in my memory. I knew this night had to be chronicled because it was one of a kind for me.
And that is how the quietness of this night looked.
Nothing explains the feelings more beautifully than this:
Night, the beloved. Night, when words fade and things come alive. When the destructive analysis of day is done, and all that is truly important becomes whole and sound again. When man reassembles his fragmentary self and grows with the calm of a tree. (Antoine de Saint-Exupery)
P. S I knew I had to write about it even though it will get late and I have office tomorrow. :)