Monday, July 04, 2011

Ten day you Challenge - Post 3. Eight fears.


Eight fears…seriously this is the toughest…and I was dreading for this post to come...so does this fear count too?? We will figure that out in a bit. Till then let me try and make an attempt at writing my eight fears. But really eight fears? Why man, why??
Now that I have taken up the challenge, I might as well do it. Anyways who says I have to write all eight, ab nahin honge to kahan se likhungi yaar?? So, chalo let’s start. Order of the fears? Well again, first four in that particular order, rest are there to scare me anytime anywhere!
1. Fear of losing people close to me. Yes, I fear losing people I love. My family, daddaa (to know about him, read previous post please) and few real good friends. I am very emotionally attached to all of them and they are my anchor. I tend to rely on them blindly and they are really few in number. I dread the thought of losing them.

2. Fear of death. I fear it may be because there is so much unaccomplished and unfinished business . This reminds to pull up my socks and get on to doing things pronto.
Lot of things to do, places to see and people to meet before I say goodbye.

3. Fear of bumping into people I have moved out from. As I had mentioned in my first post of the challenge, about ten secrests, I can never forgive and forget a few people who had hurt me. I am terrified of the moment, if it ever happens, of bumping into them. World is too big but for things like that it shrinks. For all you know, of all the places in the world, we walk into the same place. And I cant think of a sane way to deal with that awful situation.
The filmi-keeda or the drama-queen avatar of me thinks the world around me will come to a halt or it will go blurred that moment when I bump into them. And then…I don’t know!! May be, I will ignore or….whatever!!

4. Fear of failure. I have taken way too many risks in my career, so ideally I am equipped to handle lot of shocks, surprises and moving to a completely new place. Still, there is this fear of what if end up not achieving what I think I should have.

5. Fear of unknown. I had read this somewhere that this fear rates the highest across the world. I don’t know about the world but for me it sure is in my list of eight. I can best define this one as feeling of blankness before a crucial meeting or something like that. Or when everything is ok around me but I have this eeriee feeling in my heart, of something serious.
Got it? No? Leave it then. Not reading the page I mean!! Move on to the next point please!! :)

6. Fear of lifts. Ya, same old same old. Closed, small, ramshackled lifts that have steel gates or whatever. Though I can comfortably travel in the new hi-tech elevators installed these days in malls, offices etc but there are some in which my only thought is my floor to come and doors to open fast.
Also, watching horror shows have played a big role in this fear of mine. How the hell lights go out and lifts get struck?? And then how ‘Manjeet ka bhoot’ appears from nowhere? I know, that’s bhoot’s forte, to appear out of nowhere but dude!!
But then, there was this nice romantic song picturised on Kamal Hassan and Rati Agnihotri in a movie released some light years back. So, that kind of eases the fear. Hamesha bhoot nahi hote!!

7. Fear of seas/oceans/huge water bodies. I am very scared of seeing and feeling too much water around me. I remember the ferry ride from Gateway of India and it was monsoons in Mumbai, almost same time two years back. It was high tide and God knows why I did not think about that before getting into the ferry. Man! By the end of that awful ride, I was all drenched in water, feeling nauseating and sick. That smell of fish in the water, high waves, aggravated my sea-sickness.
I hate the thought of getting near to a sea.
But ya, sitting at the Marine Drive with Hilton in the background, looking at the Queen’s necklace, watching the whole city from that end, eating bhelpuri and staring into the nothingness of the sea with the setting sun is beautiful feeling. Thank God for that!! And that’s my only closeness to sea and I would like to keep it that way only.

8. Fear of wild animals. I am very scared of lions, leopards, snakes and the gang they show at Discovery. I mean, I would ideally like them staying at peace in the wild only. Bas wahin pe. Period

They say, face your fears.Darr ke aage jeet hai. May be. I can’t say. But I believe for all the stupid fears that we may be having, like a career change or getting out of a messy relationship, yes it is important to face the fear and take it all head-on. It’s definitely worth the effort!

Tomorrow, seven wants… :)

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